**Me, Ben & Cece at OUR WEDDING (!!) on 31.12.23 - the most perfect way to see in 2024!
I am personally someone who looooooves a new year to set goals, intentions and really use the opportunity to reflect on the year that was and plan what I want from the one to come. I think there’s a huge benefit in being intentional about what we want from our lives. Maybe in 2024 you want greater work/life balance, maybe it’s to re-prioritise your health, maybe it’s being more present with those you love.
One way I find helpful to consolidate this focus is to choose a word that represents your intentions for the year. In 2022 I prioritised listening to my intuition as a new mum. In 2023 I sought balance as I navigated a growing business with a small child. And in 2024 I’m focusing on joy.
By synthesising my intentions down to a single word, it helps me make decisions throughout the year. When find myself at a crossroads between two choices, I can choose the one that most aligns with my goals. When I find myself in July feeling like the year has disappeared, I can use this word to reflect on what I’ve already achieved and re-focus.
I find in Western culture, we can often neglect our ageing loved ones hopes, dreams and desires. There can be a notion that they’ve already lived a long life and achieved the goals they wanted to. However, we know that having goals gives us a sense of meaning and purpose in our lives. So why wouldn’t we apply that to our ageing loved ones too?
For this reason, the theme I’ve chosen for January is
‘Intention Setting’.
Heckhausen et al. (2021) discuss that as we age there are various challenges that can limit our ability to achieve goals. Some people experience changes to cognitive or physical abilities. Others may have reduced financial resources or experience social isolation. However, if we get creative there are always new opportunities to focus on goals during the final chapters of our life.
I find a helpful way to start is with some guiding questions. If you asked most people what their goals are for 2024, I’m not sure they’d have a reply. However guiding questions help us reflect on the year that was and set intentions for the one to come. You can work through these questions with your loved one to develop goals and set out plans to achieve them.
**I find the most engaging way to do this is to both answer the questions. A little sharing and vulnerability goes a long way to helping open up meaningful conversations.
GUIDING QUESTIONS
1. What were your highlights of 2023?
2. What were some of the most challenging moments of 2023?
3. What were you most grateful for in 2023?
4. What are you most looking forward to in 2024?
5. If you could do anything in 2024, what would it be?
**Bonus - all these things considered, what is your word for 2024?
If they’re struggling to answer these questions, you can help prompt them. You might know some of their passions or hobbies that they assume they can no longer enjoy. Open up the possibilities and find the joy in creating a plan to achieve these goals together!
GET CREATIVE
So let’s say your loved one wants to learn to salsa in 2024 or they want to travel to India… but they’re in a wheelchair and have under $2,000 available in their bank account, what do you do? We get creative.
In any possible goal, I want you to have a think about three things:
What is the meaning behind this goal?
e.g. is it really about travelling to India or are they wanting to experience the culture?
What might be the challenges achieving this goal?
e.g. mobility limitations, financial challenges, travel requirements
What are the possible solutions to achieve this goal?
e.g. what other ways can we capture the essence of this goal and still work with them to achieve it
I’ve included some examples below, so that we can hopefully start to broaden our idea about what these goals could look like:
Attend an AFL Grand Final
Meaning - Maybe they love AFL? Maybe they’re missing watching live sport in a crowd? Maybe they want to have a beer and eat a pie whilst cheering on their fave team?
Challenges - Can’t easily access a game on their own. Daunting navigating an oval after being mostly at home. Limited wheelchair access.
Solutions - Organise a day to take them to see their fave team play in your state - look into wheelchair access and plan a day with plenty of time to get around OR Take them to the pub for the Grand Final, so they can enjoy it with a schnitty and a pint OR Look up the timetable for their local league matches and organise to drive them to some games.
Read a book a month
Meaning - Maybe they love reading? Maybe they’re wanting to get into reading? Maybe they’re struggling to access new literature?
Challenges - Reduced eye sight. Access to new books. No community to share thoughts with.
Solutions - Sign up to a book delivery membership OR Find large print texts at the local library OR Sign them up to a local book club OR Make your own book club together, read the same books each month and then plan a day to debrief and discuss over a cuppa tea.
Learn to speak French
Meaning - Maybe they want to learn a new language? Maybe they’ve always loved France? Maybe they’re wanting to meet new people?
Challenges - Difficulty using technology for language apps. Unable to access local language classes.
Solutions - Download Duolingo and learn it together with some French champagne and d'Affinois! OR Find a local French club OR Sign up to the University of the Third Age (U3A).
Travel to India
Meaning - Maybe they love Indian food? Maybe they’re wanting to experience new cultures? Maybe they’re wanting to travel outside of their home?
Challenges - Cannot afford travel to India. Accessibility challenges.
Solutions - Take them to a local Diwali festival (Festival of Lights) in your state OR Organise a night where you order Indian food, listen to Indian music and use Google Maps street view to ‘travel’ around India OR Plan a mini getaway somewhere more local where they can travel outside the home.
Visit a sibling interstate
Meaning - Maybe they’re missing a connection with them? Maybe their loved one is declining and they’re worried about their health? Maybe they’re feeling lonely or isolated?
Challenges - Transport interstate. Ability to coordinate logistics.
Solutions - Organise the trip together! Plan a road-trip at a slow pace that you know they can manage OR Coordinate regular face-time chats with their sibling OR Look at other ways of getting them more socially connected in their local community.
I hope these examples help demonstrate the variety of ways we can help someone achieve a goal.
The best thing you can do is hear their hopes and dreams with an open mind. It’s easy to immediately feel like ‘there’s no way we can make that happen!’, but really listen to their wishes, write them down and work together to find a way to bring some of those goals to fruition.
Thank you again for being part of the Navigate gang. I hope you have a cup-filling Sunday - whatever that looks like for you.
Have a beautiful January and I’ll be back again on the 4th of February!
Big love, Kate.
If you’d like to chat about your unique situation and gain a better understanding of options available to you, please book a free 15 minute consult via the ‘Book Now’ button below.
Thank you again for being part of the Navigate gang. I hope you have a cup-filling Sunday - whatever that looks like for you. Have a beautiful December and I’ll be back again on the 7th of January! Big love, Kate.
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